Chapter Twenty-Five: "It Was The Last Place Left"

The journey from the Temple Islands started with an air of disappointment and fear, which would last for the entirety of the six hour trip to Cosmo Canyon. They no longer knew what to expect, or where to turn for help. The Black Materia and Sephiroth had eluded them. What would happen now?

Aeris sat on the bed in her room, her mind wandering over all that had happened. Her hopes had been so high…she felt crushed, and abandoned by her own people. There was no one waiting for her at the Temple—she didn’t even have any answers. The Keystone sat, unused and dull, on the bed in front of her. What good was it anyway? Why had they traveled all this way for nothing better than a wasted confrontation, and more questions to answer? They didn’t even know for sure whether or not Sephiroth had the Black Materia, and if he activated it…

Aeris suddenly felt very afraid, and very alone. They were feelings she usually didn’t allow herself to indulge in because she knew they did no good, but now nothing could stop the cold pit forming in her stomach. She’d fastened her hopes around the Temple, just waiting for a glimpse of her heritage to find some answers, and she had been denied even that. She truly was the last of her kind. There was no place left for her to find, no knowledge for her to gather. She was lost.

Even worse than that was the feeling that she had misled and failed her friends. They were depending on the Temple’s secrets as well for their understanding, and she had led them to a crumbling foundation and the hands of their enemies. Several of the soldiers had died for no reason—she shivered, remembering the feel of their spirits whispering to hers as they sank into the Lifestream. Now her friends were depending on her, being the only one left who might have been able to guide them, but she had no idea where to go. How could she go back to Glenn and tell him that he had been right, and it was her fault for not listening? How could she explain to Nadia and Crono that the Temple was gone and they were even worse off than before?

"Aeris?"

Aeris raised her head, drawn by the voice. She was surprised to find Cloud watching her from the doorway; he looked more exhausted and lost than she felt, but he was doing his best to hide it. She tried to smile, following his example. "Hey, Cloud. Are you feeling better now?"

"Yes," he replied, a bit withdrawn. "I spoke to Rufus a while ago, and Professor Hojo." He shuddered a bit at having to mention that name. "But I don’t know where the Promised Land is, and I don’t know if Sephiroth has the Black Materia." He shook his head in disgust. "They all seem to think that I know, but I don’t know a damn thing."

"I know how you feel," Aeris said quietly. She averted her eyes, feeling a rise of emotion in her. "I don’t know either, Cloud."

He moved into the room, glancing about with brief awkwardness at the many articles of feminine clothing that were strewn about the small room—everyone had wanted to change clothes after marching through the humid jungle, and they hadn’t done a good job of cleaning up out of exhaustion. "Where are the others?" he asked.

"Elena’s talking with Rufus, Lucca’s having her shoulder taken care of, and I’m not sure where Tifa is." She was glad to be getting off the subject of the temple. "It’s just me here."

"Are you all right?"

Aeris paused, looking at him as he sat beside her. "Hmm?" She tried to keep a pleasant air about her, but already it was failing. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I know how much this meant to you." Cloud was watching her very closely, as if searching for something. "Being the last Ancient. Are you all right?"

"I’m okay," she lied. "I mean, I always knew I was the last. It’s just a temple, anyway. And it’s…" She stopped, startled as her eyes began to dampen. Her throat constricted around the words. Embarrassed, she quickly moved to wipe the tears away. "And it’s not like I’m alone, after all. So really, I’m okay…"

Cloud placed his hand under her chin, carefully lifting it so that she was forced to look him in the face. "It’s okay, Aeris," he told her, his face expressionless, but she could hear the sympathy in his voice. "I know."

Aeris stared up at him, and all at once her emotional barriers began to crumble. She’d fought hard their entire trip, trying to pretend that she belonged with these friends even knowing that she was different. Even as a child she’d hid her abilities from everyone, hoping no one would notice. She didn’t want to be special—she didn’t want everyone to be counting on her. Looking into his eyes made her realize that, and before she could think to staunch them her tears began to fall. She hid her face in her hands, not wanting him to see; he’d been through much more pain than her and she didn’t have the right to be so weak in his presence. But instead of admonishing he put his arm hesitantly around her. He didn’t have to say anything. He closed his eyes and held her as she cried.

Tifa watched for a while at the door, unnoticed, as the sounds of their voices had alerted her from down the hall. She turned away and continued on. It was frustrating—so incredibly frustrating—to see him with Aeris wherever he went. Not that she disliked Aeris; it just didn’t seem fair. She and Cloud had history together, so why had it all changed now?

She found herself wandering into one of the other rooms. Only Sabin and Lucca were there, and they both glanced up as she entered. "Oh, there you are," Lucca said. "I was wondering where you went."

"Yeah, yeah," she muttered half-heatedly, moving to sit at the table across from them. She laid her head on her folded arms and pulled out the tie on her hair, so that it draped like a curtain over her face, shoulders and back. She sighed.

Sabin and Lucca exchanged glances. "You okay?" Lucca asked carefully.

"No. I’m exhausted." Tifa sat up once more, pushing the brown locks back. "All this ‘save-the-world-campaign’ stuff is making my head spin. Not to mention we’ve got another airship trip ahead of us. And Cloud’s been acting strange. Distant, you know?"

"Cloud always acts strange," Sabin muttered, suddenly uninterested in the conversation.. He went back to prodding at Lucca’s shoulder.

"I know," Tifa went on wearily, "but more than usual. Did you see him after he talked to Hojo?"

"No, actually. I didn’t." He looked away and scratched the back of his neck. "So can we please—"

"He was so pale," she continued anyway. "I’m really worried about him. Why is Sephiroth after him anyway?"

"I don’t know, but enough about—"

"We should try to figure out exactly what happened in Nibelheim. I’d be a better help if my memory was still intact, but I guess we’ll have to depend on something else. Maybe if we talked to Cloud some more, and—"

"That’s it, I’m leaving." Sabin pushed back from the table violently. "I’m tired of hearing about Cloud—it’s the only thing you talk about."

Tifa started, bewildered by the sudden shift in temperament. "Why shouldn’t I?" she retorted. "He’s my friend, and he’s having a rough time."

"It’s more than that." His eyes were angry, an emotion she rarely saw in him. "You practically don’t pay attention to anyone else. It’s always Cloud. But what about—"

Sabin stopped himself, catching a glance from Lucca. His fierce gaze softened and faltered from meeting hers. He sighed. "Aw, forget it." He started to go.

Tifa snatched his wrist. "Sabin, wait," she said quickly, a tightness forming in her stomach. "Tell me what you mean."

"Nothing, nothing." He shook her off. "I’m just tired. Forget I said anything."

"Sabin—"

"I said it’s nothing." And before she could protest further he was gone, the door closing loudly behind him.

Tifa stared at the exit a moment before turning to Lucca. "What was that all about?" she asked, feeling a bit shaky.

Lucca shrugged, though she obviously knew—it was clear on her face. "Who knows. He’s a guy."

"You’re a bad liar," she retorted, letting out a deep sigh. She leaned over the table. "Was he right? Am I paying attention only to Cloud?"

"No offense, but, yeah."

Another low exhalation. "But what’s that to Sabin? Do you think…" She frowned, and suddenly her mood lowered even further. "Do you think…maybe…that’s why he’s mad?"

"It’s really none of my business." Lucca made a look of helplessness. "I mean, what do you want me to say? I don’t know either of you really well."

"But…if that’s it…you don’t have any advice?"

"Correct."

"Just great." She lowered her head on to the table once more, staring at the wall blankly as if for help. "What should I do? Should I talk to him?" She rubbed her eyes. "What a mess."

Lucca shrugged. "Sorry I can’t be more helpful, but this isn’t my field."

"It’s okay." She sighed, trying to clear her mind of yet another confusing factor in her thoughts. "But I can’t decide what to do right now. I…I have to think about this."

***************

Celes was dreaming again. In her slumber her mind was constantly plagued by images from a turbulent and distant past: moments of joy and despair, elation and fear, every emotion she’d ever felt colliding in a mass of brilliant, life-like colors and human characters. Her friends, her enemies, the men who inspired and chided her—they were all there, dancing, laughing, dying…

Presently she was walking swiftly down a hallway that she knew well: one that connected to each other SOLDIER rooms. She was following someone, her strides swift and flawless as always. The man ahead of he was draped in a long black coat that obscured most of his other features, save the length of perfect silver hair that trailed down his back. Sephiroth.

"Seph!"

The man stopped in his gait, slowly turning to face her. She stopped short of reaching him as his eyes met hers. Their usually elegant and beautiful emerald shade was now fierce, almost frightening. She continued toward him with significantly less confidence under his stare. "Sephiroth," she said softly, her voice also affected by the change in his appearance. "We have to talk." His entire face seemed different to her: instead of the silent, almost thoughtful expression he often gave her this was cold and emotionless. It was a subtle change that no one else could notice, but from her perspective it was as obvious as if he were an entirely different person.

Sephiroth didn’t answer her. He watched her, waiting for her to continue. This wasn’t like him. Whenever they talked seriously—as was her intention, clear in her face—they always did so alone. Somehow she knew he was strangely shy around the others, as if he knew they weren’t like him, and he didn’t want any of them to see the openness he directed towards her, his one true friend in Shin-ra or anywhere. That he would risk a conversation as important as this here, in the open, mentally staggered her.

"Sephiroth, did you hear?" she asked, hoping that any moment he would signal for them to move to a secluded room. Already they were drawing the attention of those members in the hall. "They’ve split us up."

He nodded slowly, and when he spoke his voice was cold. "Yes, I know."

"Well…why didn’t you say something?" She had hoped that some outburst of anger would come to her as, in prior occasions, it had allowed her to get through to him in difficult situations like this. However, now her emotions were confused by his reactions, and her voice faltered.

"Why didn’t you?" he said. "You’re the general, aren’t you?"

"Seph, I…" Celes took a deep breath. "Aren’t you upset about this at all? Now that we’re not partners…and what am I supposed to do? How can I take care of a bunch of trainees on my own?"

Sephiroth met her gaze directly, and she actually felt herself shrinking away from him. Why was she so afraid? He was her friend, the boy she’d grown up with through years of an isolated and lonely way of life. Something had happened to him—something she didn’t understand. "Seph," she pleaded quietly, "what’s wrong with you? Why are acting like this? Don’t you care that they’re trying to take us apart?" She felt herself on the brink of tears, but she wouldn’t let them show. He would see it as a weakness, and that was the last impression she could have given to him now. "What happened to you?"

His eyes finally averted from hers, but the expression on his face didn’t change. "I’m sorry, Chere, that you don’t understand." He returned to watching her. "But you and I are special, Chere. We’re different. We’re better than them. When I watched Kefka die…that will someday be all of their fates. Every one of them is going to die that way. But not you and I, because we’re different."

"Stop it," Celes demanded fiercely. "What are you talking about? Why are we different?"

"We…just are." He tilted his head to the side, and his eyes swirled. "I’m not certain yet. But when it happens…then I will understand. And so will you."

"Seph…stop this, please." His words had sunken deep inside her, shook her very bones as if somewhere, inside her, she already knew what he meant. He was speaking truth, but her rational mind forced her to deny it. "You’re wrong. No one is going to die; I’ll make sure of that."

"You won’t be able to." He turned away and continued down the hall. "When it ends."

"Seph…Seph!" Celes clenched her fists, afraid and confused, but unable to follow. "Seph…I don’t…I don’t understand…" She felt the tears burning down her cheeks. "Sephiroth!"

***************

Celes opened her eyes slowly. She was lying on her back in bed, carefully situated among soft pillows and warm blankets. Her SOLDIER garb had been replaced with her yellow spring dress. She wasn’t alone. Locke was sitting on the edge of the bed, having discarded his coat and cap, head bowed. It took her a moment to realize that he was asleep in a sitting position. She smiled faintly, pushing herself up. "Did you fall asleep watching me?" she asked quietly.

Locke grumbled something in his sleep, and she leaned closer to try and make it out. The words were unintelligible. But at that proximity she noticed something: tear tracks, all the way down his face. She traced the paths gingerly with her fingers, and he began to sir. His eyelids fluttered.

"Good morning." She stroked his cheek with the backs of her fingers. "Are you okay?"

He yawned and stretched, then paused as he noticed her presence for the first time. "Oh, Celes. You’re awake."

The general nodded. "Yeah, you too."

"I was worried." His voice was low and rough, like that of a man who’d been forced through great emotional stress. His face was haggard. "You fainted at the Temple, and it’s been hours. Are you all right?"

"I suppose. I feel all right." She felt strangely revitalized by her sleep. "But you look terrible."

Locke nodded gloomily. "Motion sickness can do that."

"But that’s not all."

"Guess not." He rubbed his eyes and exhaled deeply. "It never is, really. I’m just messed up."

Celes suddenly realized what was unsettling him. He’d been absolutely adamant about exploring the Ancient’s Temple—it was the center of all his hopes for returning Rachael to him. All those expectations had been brutally crushed. Not only had he not found the Phoenix, but its place of resting was also gone, and whatever fate that had befallen the Temple had claimed his dreams as well.

"Locke, I’m so sorry," said Celes truthfully. "But were you absolutely sure that it was in the Temple?" She didn’t have to mention the name for him to know what she was referring to. "Maybe there’s some other place."

He laughed bitterly. "I’ve been looking for the last three years," he replied shakily. "Glenn and I have been all over the world. It was the last place left."

"I’m sorry."

"And damnit, he knew." The blankets curled in his fists. "He probably knew the whole time that the Temple wouldn’t be there, and for three years he let me wander about like a fool That son of a… I put my whole heart into that."

"Locke, don’t blame Glenn," she said, and shocked herself in that she was defending him, her enemy. "If he knew, there must have been some reason for not telling you."

"Damn it."

The general licked her lips, as she no longer knew what to say. She touched his shoulder and he began to speak again. "It made me think, though." His tone had dropped several pitches, so that he was barely whispering. "I’m so tired of looking, Celes. For a while, when I learned that Aeris was an Ancient, I felt like myself. But that was just a mask." He sighed; it was a hollow, lonely sound. "Three years of wasting my life in a dream. I think it’s time I gave up trying."

"Locke…"

"It’s all right." The smile formed itself on his trembling lips. "It’s time. I don’t want to forget her, but…well, I’ll let her rest in peace." He hummed thoughtfully. "Maybe then I can, too."

Celes leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him from behind, and his hands covered hers. To her these motions of comfort were like instinct, and she didn’t give them a second thought. "I’m sorry," she said softly. "I know she meant everything to you. Are you sure you want to leave it behind? It’ll be hard."

"I know." He leaned against her wearily, and closed his eyes to indulge his mind in one last fleeting image of his phantom’s god-like beauty. I’m sorry, Rachael. And it was like a burden lifted from his soul. He could almost hear her voice whispering to him.

He did, and for the first time in years his dreams were blissfully peaceful.

The rest of the trip passed uneventfully. For the most part the passengers spent the time in solitude, hoping to make sense of the problems they’d faced and those that lay ahead. Sabin apologized to Tifa and then avoided her; Celes left Locke alone to ponder his decision; Lucca stayed with Aeris, and Cloud spoke to no one. They were all thoroughly relieved to reach Cosmo Canyon early the next evening. Rufus spoke with Belthasar and Mog for almost an hour and then departed, taking Reno and Rude with him. The absence of the Shin-ra was also a welcomed event. "You see?" Mog said pointedly. "I was helping you all along. Now they can think we’re just as clueless as they are as to the Black Materia’s whereabouts."

Celes stared at him incredulously. "You mean that was all a scam?" she demanded. "You knew it wasn’t there, but you told Shin-ra to go just so they would think we made a mistake?"

"Kupo!" He grinned. "Now they think you’re all incompetent—maybe we’ll have some privacy, at least." He started to go, and waved for them to follow. "This way, please. Your friends have been hard at work. Do you still have that materia I gave you?"

"Materia? Oh!" She dug into her bag and pulled out the shiny red sphere. "I forgot all about it."

"Then I assume it’s unused—splendid. Come on. Everything will be made clear soon."

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