Chapter Fifteen: "Keep Yourself Unharmed."

Exhausted from that day of traveling, Cloud brought his group to rest already deep into the mountains whose path would take them to Nibelheim. He’d been lost in his own thoughts throughout the journey, only speaking when asked a question directly. He knew that his behavior was disturbing his companions but he didn’t seem to care anymore. He didn’t care if they all thought he was crazy. All that mattered to him now was finding Sephiroth, and discovering the truth of what had happened to him. Thus when Aeris approached him it took a moment before he realized that she was speaking to him. He raised his head. "What was that?"

"I asked if you’d help us," Aeris replied brightly. "Since we’re stopped for the night anyway, Nadia and I want you to teach us."

"Teach you?" he repeated, puzzled.

"How to fight!" Nadia declared, surprising him with her enthusiasm. "No one taught me how to use the damn materia I bought. How am I supposed to kick ass if I don’t know how?"

Sabin, who had just finished getting a fire started, smiled. "She’s got a point."

"I’m not a good teacher," Cloud protested. "Especially when it comes to beginners."

But the two girls had already set their minds, and they pulled him to his feet. "Don’t be silly," Aeris said, excitement in her voice. "We’re both quick studies, right Nadia?"

"Of course. Come on—well have fun." She poked his cheek. "You look like you could use it. Teach me how to fry something or I’ll figure it out myself."

"You could kill yourself that way," Cloud muttered, realizing that there was no way out now. He shrugged. "Sure, okay. Whatever. I’ll teach you." He paused, glancing down at Tifa. "What about you?"

Tifa seemed surprised by his question, and after a moment shook her head. "No, you three go ahead. I’m a little tired right now."

"Alright." He was disappointed, but shrugged the mood off quickly. He started off with the other two. "This won’t take long."

Sabin gazed at Tifa curiously across the fire as they moved away from view. "Why didn’t you go with him?"

"Oh, I don’t know." Tifa crossed her arms, watching the flames as they flickered and danced. "Somehow I don’t think they wanted me along."

"Strife did."

She blinked, finally returning his gaze. "What?"

He popped the last piece of meat from dinner into his mouth. "Couldn’t you tell? Why do you think he asked?"

"Don’t be stupid, Sabin," she admonished humorously. "Anyway, I know Aeris didn’t want me to come." Her voice was quickly becoming bitter. "She wants him to herself."

"Don’t be so jealous." Sabin couldn’t help being blunt, but so far it seemed to be working. "I mean, you two have history together, right? You said he was your ‘personal body guard.’ That’s gotta account for more than anything she’s got."

Tifa smiled at him appreciatively, moving to sit by his side. "For an ox," she joked, shouldering him playfully, "you can be pretty nice sometimes."

"Thanks…I guess…"

"No, you’re not an ox." She adopted a more quiet tone. "But, do you really think I could patch things up between me and Cloud? Really?"

Sabin quickly answered, "I think it’s possible."

"Thanks. You’re a great guy, Sabin. I mean that."

He nodded, averting his eyes. His hands fidgeted restlessly. "Sure, Tifa. Think nothing of it."

"This looks like a good spot," Cloud said, gazing about. Following the mountain trail had been difficult travel and left few places of level ground to move about on. The space he’d discovered was somewhat small for a battleground, but would have to do. "So, what did you want me to teach you first?"

"The materia," Nadia said immediately. "Aeris may know what she’s doing but I sure don’t." She shoved the green sphere under his nose. "Make it work."

He rolled his eyes, pushing it out of his face. "It wouldn’t kill you to be a little more polite."

"You’re not polite," she retorted. "Besides, I’m a Shin-ra. I don’t have to be. Now, are you gonna teach me or not?"

"Sure, I will, but just remember that I’m not doing this for me."

"Sure. Uh-huh."

Cloud sighed, and he could hear Aeris giggling behind him. They’re up to something, he thought gloomily. "Okay, we’ll start from the beginning," he announced, pulling a materia out of his pocket. "Materia is Mako energy that has been compressed, right?"

"And Mako is the life energy of the planet," Aeris added.

He cocked an eye, then continued. "Well, some materia can be activated simply by thinking about it—like the chocobo lure—but most complex materia requires that you chant something before using it. Then you can consciously control how much of the spell is used. Like this." He held out his materia, and the girls stepped back. It began to glow a bright emerald. In a normal tone of voice he said "Ice," and a dozen tiny crystals formed around the sphere—and his hand—like a glass skin. Then they fell to the earth and shattered. He put the materia away. "See?"

"But that wasn’t a chant," Nadia objected.

Cloud shrugged. "Close enough. The more powerful the chant, the more powerful the spell. Usually one word is good for a pretty decent spell, depending on the caster."

She scrutinized her own materia carefully. "That’s all?"

"Uh-huh."

"Oh." She looked unsatisfied, but then she brightened as an idea sprang to mind. "Well, I’ll go practice and you can help Aeris," she said, skipping off before either could protest. "Don’t worry, I’ll be careful."

The pair exchanged glances, and Aeris shrugged. By now it was obvious to him what had happened; the strange thing was that he didn’t mind. "So," he started easily, "what did you need help with?" Playing ignorance wasn’t usually his style, but he decided it might be interesting to see what she would do.

Aeris smiled that same secretive smile of hers, retrieving her staff. "I can use materia; I want to learn how to fight."

"Don’t ask for anything simple," he grunted. "It takes years of training and practice to learn how to fight worth a damn."

"Well, you’ve got about two hours to teach me," she replied cheerfully. "You up to it?"

"I guess I’ll try." Cloud frowned and, more for her benefit than his, made a sweeping look over her. He laughed internally as she blushed. "You’re not much for muscle, are you?"

"Tifa doesn’t have much muscle," Aeris pointed out, "and she’s a martial artist."

It was almost too easy; he fought hard to keep a straight face. "You might be right, but she makes up for it in other areas."

"You’re a pig," she shot back, cheeks reddening. It infuriated her even more when he shrugged innocently. "Oh, never mind. You said you’d help me, right?"

Cloud couldn’t help a wry grin. "Yeah, I’m working on it." After some consideration he’d gathered his thoughts. "Since you’re not very strong I’ll teach you some basic guarding skills and a couple easy attacks. Nothing fancy, of course, but better than nothing." He bit his lip. "Okay, show me how you hold that thing."

Aeris did, and he immediately began correcting her. "Hold it like this," he instructed, positioning her hands. "Keep your hands further apart—no, too far. Stand a little bit—yeah, like that. Okay, good. Now don’t lock your elbows. Not bad."

They went on like that for an hour almost, Cloud as teacher and Aeris struggling to do what he said. He often took advantage of her devotion to learning, which sparked several heated arguments between the pair. In addition, he was determined to embarrass her in any way possible. When finally she’d grown tired of it she exclaimed, "You’re doing all this on purpose!"

He lifted an eyebrow. "Doing what?" She was about to fire back something, but he interrupted. "You’re the one who convinced Nadia to go along with this, am I right?"

Aeris’ face flushed red, and she demanded, "Are you implying that Nadia and I lured you away from the others simply for the purpose of letting me spend some time alone with you?"

Cloud grinned ironically. "Uh…no. That wasn’t it at all."

She mocked a punch to his jaw. "Cloud Strife, you are terrible."

"I know." He laughed. A strange feeling had come over him—he wasn’t quite used to the fact that she was, he realized, flirting with him. Most of his woman experience had come from his being with Tifa, and she never acted like this, as she had always been too busy to notice him at all. But now he was enjoying the attention. He was about to continue with another comeback when something brushed up against his leg. "What the—"

"It’s just a lizard," Aeris said, picking it off the ground. It looked like an iguana of some sort, about two feet long with greenish-gray skin. She patted its head and it made a sound suspiciously similar to a cat’s purr. "Isn’t he cute?"

Cloud made a face at the protruding eyes. "No. I’d hate to be something that ugly."

She chuckled. "Don’t let him hear you say that," she warned, "or he might try something."

As if in response the lizard opened its mouth, displaying rows of tiny teeth. Its putrid breath blew against Cloud’s face. "Ugh, disgusting." He knocked it out of her hands, and it landed with a screech and scattered off. He wiped his face. "How can you like something like that?"

She turned to see where it had gone. "I don’t know. It’s not ugly, just—" When she glanced back, however, Cloud was gone. "Cloud?" She swept her gaze over the clearing, and caught sight of a pile of clothes: Cloud’s clothes. Confused and a bit wary she knelt down, poking about the folds of material. Her hand touched something warm and she pulled it out of the bundle.

It was a lizard.

Aeris blinked several times. "Cloud?" she asked tentatively, looking the reptile over. "Is that you?"

It blinked slowly.

"Oh my god…Nadia! Hey Nadia, get over here!"

A moment later Nadia appeared. "What, you guys done? I’ve been doping around for an hour." She paused, staring down at the pile of clothes. Her jaw dropped. "Oh my god, you didn’t…"

"No, of course not," she replied hastily. She held up the animal. "I think he got turned into a lizard."

Both women cracked up in laughter, the severity of their situation lost in its ridiculousness. "Isn’t he cute?" Aeris giggled, patting him on the head much the same way she’d done to the first.

"Definitely an improvement," her friend agreed, and she laughed even harder as he hissed at her. "Give him a kiss and maybe you’ll get a prince."

"Yeah, maybe." She made a doubtful face, but just then her ears detected a faint noise, like footsteps too heavy to be a man’s, and her heart began to quicken its pace. "Something’s here," she whispered; she could feel Cloud struggling in her grip. "It’s coming this way."

Nadia jerked her head up, her eyes scanning the small clearing. "Where? What is it?"

"Don’t know." Aeris dipped her hand into the bundle of clothes, quickly locating the materia in Cloud’s gloves. "We’ve got to get Sabin and Tifa."

The low breath of a large animal echoed within the rock walls, joining the footfalls and the sound of claws scratching the earth. A long, pointed-snout head moved around the edge of an outcropping, covered in scales and spines. It’s yellow eyes focused quickly on the pair, and it snarled.

Nadia pulled the crossbow off her back and fitted an arrow as the beast scrutinized them carefully. "What is that thing?"

"Not sure," her friend admitted, slipping the ice and lightning materia into the slots of her staff. Then she noticed the red materia Pricilla had given them, and she held it tightly—somehow it gave her a feeling of security. "It looks like a dragon, I think."

"That’s bad, right?"

"You really don’t get out much, do you?"

The dragon lumbered forward, pulling its massive body into view with its thick limbs, head rising on the tall neck. Its huge jaws worked anxiously as it watched them. Every inch of its flesh was covered in dark green scales like plates of carefully strung armor, and its talons gleamed. They could see bits of something that might have been flesh tangled in them.

"Oh god." Nadia looked like she might flee, but the older woman held her still. "It’s gonna eat us—"

"Be quiet," Aeris whispered, setting Cloud up on her shoulder. She could feel his claws digging into her coat and pricking her skin. "Don’t move until he attacks—he’s a lot bigger, so he’ll move more slowly. Stay with me."

"Okay." She held the crossbow close to her, and together they slowly backed away. It followed. The women stayed calm, holding in their panic until their backs hit solid rock. Then they glanced at each other, gulping down saliva until their mouths were dry. "Now what?" Nadia croaked weakly.

The huge head came screaming down at them, and they split up as its teeth clashed with the wall. It bellowed in fury. Nadia fired her crossbow, but the arrow struck its dark scales and reflected without effect. It did succeed, however, in gathering its attention. The clawed paws lashed out and she ran screaming.

Aeris ran forward, dodging the beast’s thick tail as she quickly moved to its back leg. With a quick chant she jabbed her staff into a gap in the scales, and fierce electricity coursed through the dragon’s hide. It screamed shrilly in pain; the effect wore off far too quickly. The tail swept about and knocked her heavily in the side—she was sent tumbling across the rock, only to land in a heap at the edge of the clearing. She groaned and fell unconscious.

"Aeris! Oh no…" Nadia wailed, growing panicked as the head swiveled to face her. "Oh god, somebody help…" Her hands fastened desperately about her materia. "Please work," she whispered, trembling so much that the words almost didn’t form. "Please ice, freeze this son of a—"

The dragon bellowed in anguish, a large gash slicing across the front of its muscular chest. She had no time to realize what had happened when Tifa appeared beside her, dragging her behind a group of small boulders. "Are you all right?" she demanded in concern. "What happened?"

"I don’t know," Nadia said, still shaking. "We were just fooling around, and Cloud turned into a lizard, and then the dragon—"

"Cloud what?"

"A lizard," she repeated. "He’s with Aeris."

Sabin skidded to a halt beside them, and Nadia yelped in surprise. "Where’s Strife and Aeris?" he asked, breathing hard. His Mithril Gloves were stained. The monster was still growling in hatred and agony as the wound poured black blood, but it was quickly regaining its senses.

Nadia pointed. "Over there. Aeris is unconscious, and Cloud’s a lizard."

He stared at her dumbly. "Say what?"

The dragon charged and Sabin was off again, trying to draw its attention from the two women. It snarled and opened its jaws wide. A bright glow of yellow flame began to form in the huge cavity. He quickly retreated behind a rock as the flaming breath cascaded from its drooling lips, dancing crazily as it hit the cold stone earth.

Without thinking Tifa ran out of hiding, tightening the spiked Mithril Gloves on her hands. She didn’t know what she intended to do, only that it had to be something. With the dragon’s attention on Sabin she was able to approach close to its underbelly; she tried to ignore the furrows dug in the rock from its talons. Taking a deep breath she plunged her weapons into the beast’s belly, ripping scales away from the tender flesh.

The dragon shrieked, and its headed twisted around, but it never reached her. A figure streaked out of an alcove she hadn’t seen before, a blur of white movement, and she was lifted up by the waist and carried out of reach of the monster. The next thing she knew a cold wind had descended on the clearing, and she was set down next to Nadia. The man who’d rescued her knelt at her side; he looked young, dressed in white armor to match his flaming violet hair. His eyes, blue and intense, flickered from her to the dragon in wild restlessness. She stared at him. "You’re in SOLDIER," she said, almost accusingly. "Who are you?"

His wandering eyes paused on her only a moment. "Are you unharmed?" he asked firmly.

Tifa nodded. "Yes, thank you. Who are you?"

"It’s good you’re safe," was all he said.

Nadia tapped her shoulder, pointing to the spectacular scene unfolding. The dragon had been incased in a shield of solid ice, trapped, its dark skin and angry eyes still barely visible. Above the frosted monument hovered the blue-hued figure of a woman, but as Tifa watched she vanished without a trace. She left only a cold wake of chill air to drift about in her place.

Tifa turned back to the man that had rescued her. "What happened?"

"Are you unharmed?" he asked again.

"Yes." She frowned. "Who are you? Why did you help us?"

He shook his head fiercely, and turned away. "Keep yourself unharmed," he advised gravely, leaping gracefully onto a ledge high above her. Three more figures were there, draped in black cloaks. When he joined them they covered him in a garb of the same, and as one unit they scampered into the shadows.

"Are you okay?" Sabin was there suddenly, holding his wrist—his left hand had been badly burned. "Did you see what happened? That was amazing!"

"No, I didn’t." Tifa allowed her eyes to leave the rock face, focusing back on the frozen monster. "I didn’t do anything, either."

Nadia shrugged. "Wasn’t me."

"It was Shiva," a voice spoke up, and they turned to see Aeris approaching. She looked disheveled but not seriously hurt. "A summoned spirit. And guess who cast the spell." She lifted up the lizard that was Cloud; he had the red materia gripped in his front legs, and regarded his friends with the best approximation of arrogance a reptile could manage. Aeris took the sphere from him and slipped it into her pouch. "Not bad for an iguana, huh?"

"Well, wha’do’ya know." Sabin laughed. "Saved by an ugly thing like that."

Cloud hissed indignantly, and everyone laughed. "But really," Tifa said, "we ought to think of a way to change him back."

"I think he’s cute like that," Nadia protested. "Do we have to?"

"Of course!"

Sabin considered a moment. "I’ve heard of stuff like this. Some animals can perform magic like that. Transformations and such."

"So how do we reverse it?" Aeris asked.

"Depends. I’ve never encountered a lizard before." He shrugged. "But we’re only a day away from Nibelheim. Maybe someone there will know."

Tifa looked away. "Nibelheim was destroyed," she replied quietly. "There’s nothing there anymore."

"Well, we don’t really have a choice. Grab his stuff and let’s go back to the camp—maybe it’ll wear off."

They decided that his suggestion was the only possible option, and so they all headed back to the campfire. Tifa glanced back one last time, hoping to maybe catch sight of the cloaked men, but by now there were far gone.

When Celes awoke she was still outside. The sun had just risen, painting gentle hues of golden light across the sleepy town. Her body was stiff from sleeping against the tree, and her stomach ached. Being careful not to upset the organ she stood, bracing herself against the sturdy bark as her balance regained itself, and she rubbed her eyes to clear them. She wondered vaguely what time it was.

The door to Zack’s parent’s hut opened, and following instinct she moved around the tree so that she wouldn’t be seen—she didn’t feel ready to face any of them yet. She waited, and to her surprise Locke appeared in the doorway; he looked tired, bags of insomnia hanging under his pale eyes. After a deep breath of the morning air he strolled out into the village, left shoulder jerking awkwardly as he walked.

Curiosity built up inside the general, and she began to follow. She followed him down the main road—even in the early hours there were enough people about to keep her out of view. But they weren’t interested in her. They were watching Locke, some disbelieving, others resentful and the rest indifferent. They all watched him though, as if to see what he might do. The women traded whispers as he passed, and the men glared and scowled. One man about Locke’s age dared to go up to him. She crept closer to hear.

"It’s really you, isn’t it?" he asked, his voice cold. "It’s been three years at least. What are you doing back?"

"Passing through," he answered, smiling ruefully. "Don’t worry, I’m not staying long."

The man’s eyes narrowed. "We don’t want you staying at all. Don’t you get it by now? You’re not welcomed here."

Locke started walking again. "You didn’t always think so," he said, and Celes was amazed at how he could keep his voice light. "We were pals back then, right? You and me got into a lot of trouble together."

"Yeah, and you got into even more by yourself. This town isn’t your playground now." He kept with him, voice rising with Celes following all along. "I heard you got shot up—we don’t want any trouble, you hear me? Shin-ra’s been outta here last three years, and we’re not gonna let you bring them back."

Locke waved a hand at him, and he would have persisted had a woman not taken his arm. The man melted back into the crowd grumbling. The treasure hunter went on under the stares and whispers, not meeting any gazes and not speaking a word. Celes couldn’t stand it anymore. She moved to his side, but even then he didn’t notice her at first. She took his hand; it was cold, so much so that it surprised her. "Locke, why are you doing this?" she asked quietly.

"I gotta do something," he replied evenly, and his hand was tight around hers. "It won’t take long. Cosmo Canyon isn’t far from here: I’ll be done and we can get going, and be there by evening. That buggy’s faster than I thought."

"But you shouldn’t walk around like this," she insisted, noting that now she was receiving the same stares he was. "You’re getting everyone worked up."

"I’m not ashamed."

"There’s a difference between being ashamed and being sorry for yourself. This isn’t doing you any good, showing off to everyone that you’re here. Let’s go back."

Locke glanced down at her and smiled his heart-breaking smile. "I said there’s something I gotta do."

Celes sighed, realizing now that she could not win against him. They walked together to large hut on the outside of town—a bright place with colorful flowers, but the windows were very small and there were few of them. The door was opened by a gray-haired man wearing elaborate robes, a hat, and spectacles. "Oh, Locke Cole!" he declared, ushering them quickly inside. "It’s been years, boy, but I did what you said. She’s still here."

Locke nodded and gestured to Celes. "Melchior, this is Celes Chere, a good friend," he introduced. "Celes, this is Melchior, Guru of Life."

He shook her hand warmly. "Good to meet you," he said warmly. "General Celes, isn’t it?"

"Yes. You recognize me?"

"I am the Guru of Life," he replied, chuckling to himself. "Yes, I know about Shin-ra. I suppose you’re both here to see Miss Rachael."

Celes frowned, turning to her companion. "What is he talking about?"

But Locke didn’t answer, speaking instead to Melchior. "You still keeping her in the basement?"

"Where the flowers grow best."

"Mind if I see her?"

"Not at all." Melchior motioned to a door in the back wall, handing him a key from his pocket. "Any luck?"

"Not yet, but maybe soon."

The door opened into a descending staircase, dimly lit by candles that were mostly burnt down. Locke led the way silently into the basement. It opened into a small chamber, sunlight burning in from rectangular windows near the ceiling. Beautiful red flowers lined the walls and surrounded the form of a woman who lay on a bed with white satin sheets. As Celes came closer she could see that the woman was in her early twenties, wavy black hair cushioning her head against the soft pillow. She was exactly as Locke had described her—Celes had assumed her beauty to be part of the man’s elaborate exaggerations, but now she knew that to be a lie. It was amazing—her cheeks were full of color, her skin scented with the blossoms’ perfume and free of any decay. Several times she was forced to remind herself that the woman was dead.

"Just after the accident I used materia to heal all her injuries," Locke explained, his voice hollow in the stone-walled chamber. "But I couldn’t bring her back. That’s when I found Melchior." He arranged the red and white dress around Rachael, but she noted that he took great care in not touching her skin. "He had herbs and those flowers that can preserve the body long after death. He promised to keep her here and safe until I returned with a way to bring her back."

Celes bit her lip, catching a glimpse of the look in his eyes. She could feel herself trembling, just like the night before. "Locke…"

"I know there’s a way," he insisted, though his voice lacked its usual exuberance. "A long time ago there was a being known as the Phoenix, one that could raise a soul from the dead. Its powers were sealed into a materia." He plucked one of the larger blossoms from its place by the wall, placing it neatly in her hair. Finally he settled, hands resting on the edge of the bed, and after a moment he removed his cap. "Glenn told me that members of SOLDIER usually carry good materia, and since he seemed like a good guy, I decided to work with him."

"That’s why…" Celes lowered her head in guilt. "Locke…I feel terrible. I called you a grave-robber, but you were doing it for her. I didn’t know."

"Don’t go thinking I’m such a great guy," he rejoined pleasantly. "I kept all the stuff even if it wasn’t the right one. I’m still looking." His voice dropped abruptly, echoing the look of sorrow that glinted in his eyes. "There’s something I didn’t tell the others," he said, the words barely carried on his breath, forcing her to move closer to hear. "I’ll tell you, though. Don’t know why, but I’ll tell you."

"You don’t have to."

"I want to." His lip curled; she was beginning to hate that expression on his face because she could feel the turmoil it hid. How could she comfort someone who didn’t act like they needed it? Presently he reached into one of his many pouches, retrieving a small gold hairpin. "It’s Fiona’s," he affirmed, chuckling faintly with the memories. "I always thought it was beautiful—must have given it to Rachael a dozen times. This is what brought back her memory."

Celes licked her lips, urged to speak, but she waited patiently. A moment later he elaborated. "About two months after I left one of the guys in my gang tried to hit on her—she nearly tore him to pieces, or so her mother told me. And that night she found this." He ran his fingers over the intricate gold markings affectionately. "Her memory started to came back."

"But you said you came back after three months," she reminded.

Locke nodded. "Yes, but I was too afraid to let anyone see me. Here she was, waiting for me to come back, and I was too scared to even show my face." He sighed distantly, slipping the pin into his pocket once more. His hands returned to the bed. "She must have thought I ran off and found someone else, but really I was just scared. The kinda thing a guy kills himself for over and over." She noticed that he was trembling, and the light reflected waveringly in his eyes, but the smile stayed. "Her last words were, that if I ever came back, someone would tell me that she loved me. Always."

"Locke…" Celes gazed at the woman that lay in her peaceful slumber, and then at the man beside her. "When you saved my life," she said slowly, "you were really saving her, weren’t you?"

"Funny, isn’t it?" he laughed, though his humor was being choked by the thickening emotions. "Three years and I’m still trying to be the king of chivalry. I don’t know what I’m thinking anymore." His hand wandered across the bed sheets. "Maybe I thought I could bring her back." His fingers brushed her hair, and he flinched at the texture of it. "I see this face, just as she was, and it’s not hard to think that I could do it. Somehow, I could." His hand poised over her face, straining between longing and fear. His fingers curled, stretching and recoiling, and he couldn’t bring himself to touch her. "I see that night in my mind, and even though I’m dying inside I can’t let her go. It’s funny, but I just can’t." He bit his lip, shaking his head, and smiled. "I can’t."

Celes pulled his hand away—it was cold and shaking almost violently. She stared at his face: the muscles locking tightly about his jaw and all along his neck; the pain spreading in his gray eyes; and that smile. It trembled on his visage the same way his hand shook in hers, but still it remained pasted into place. The rest of his expression clung to it desperately, as if it were the last bit of stability and courage, and to lose that vestige of humor would cause everything to crumble. But it was quickly breaking down.

She couldn’t help it anymore. She pulled Locke to her, holding his head against her shoulder. At first his body was tense and fearful, but all at once the barriers came crashing down. She was surprised by how tightly he held her as the agony overflowed his eyes and the laughter fled from his lips and was shattered like brittle glass. He cried into her hair and shuddered with the sobs, and she held him close, shedding his tears through her own eyes.

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